Why just complain when you can do something about it?

Money magnets

Have you ever been ripped off, felt there was an injustice done to you or others you care about, or what just happened is just plain wrong? If you are reading this post you have more clout and influence than you may give yourself credit for. Why is it we just like complaining about silly things, important things, issues that are under the bridge already and not do anything about it?

Complaining expends an enormous amount of energy. Do you remember a time when you go so mad you were shaking, your face turned red, hands were clenched into fists, and you cursed and ranted to no avail? Energy is energy. There is no difference in it being energy whether it is energy created out of rage, creativity, laughter, passion, love, etc. It also is either positive or negative energy, but still energy. Obviously, the outcomes of this energy will vary depending on how you direct it, as well as what comes back to nip you in the butt or reward you like Aladdin.

Okay, so they tell you can move mountains.. well lets get real you can’t move mountains unless you have several nuclear warheads. You can proverbially move mountains though with how your energy focuses. So too, with energy you can create amazing outcomes. Here is the skinny on energy: emit and create negative energy and you get negative results. Here’s an example: how many times have you seen someone get fighting mad at someone and take a swing? Does the other person fight back? What about someone yelling at someone else? Have you ever witnessed the other person yelling back and finally getting into a shouting match to get one up on the other?

Lets take positive energy.. there was an insurance commercial I saw where people were paying it forward as the ripples in the water spread out and touched others. Ever see an accident where someone courageously dived right into a smoldering rubble to help unearth those who may be buried, but others stood a watched until that one person took action? When some brought you dinner, gave you a present, do you feel compelled to reciprocate? This is like energy at work.

In hearing about organizations withdrawing funds to support what they stand for, donors got mad and started blogging and posting to social networks about their unhappiness. Where is this all going? Its good to inform others but there is more that can be done that actually would make that angry person feel better about themselves than venting won’t.

Let me share this important fact about our modern society and US businesses and non-profits alike.. Other than its labor force money is the source of all business sustainability and growth, whether for or non-profit. Although some entities may have a great purpose helping or serving others the bottomline is without funding they will go bust and shut down. What this means instead of using your energy in a negative manner by just complaining, take your money and donate to the organization you believe in and whose mission you truly support that was cut off by the organization you hoped was funding the smaller one. You’d be surprised how money talks and BS walks. Aren’t a donor, don’t have the money? How about volunteering to help champion the abused and struggling or create awareness not by complaining but showing the good in what supporting a worthy initiative.

You can apply this principle to every part of your personal and business life. Be productive with your energy, make it positive and like a boomerang it will come back to you in rewarding ways. Use your energy negatively and with selfish intent and that is exactly the circle of people and results you will get back, as your energy will attract like energy.

On September 14–16, 2012 on a 1,150 acre property of pristine forest with hiking trails and waterfalls flowing with high natural energy there will be the nation’s largest and first indoor/outdoor festivals and retreats of its kind for spiritual awakening and holistic health, as well as fitness and health. If you are serious about how you can create more positive energy in your life despite all the negative, you should check it out. The website will go live in mid February 2012 and is at http://festivalforchange.com.

Location is nestled between NYC and Woodstock, NY.

Something to think about.. you can either be the solution, or you can be your life’s own biggest challenge.

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Protect Your Brand, Business and Customers — Use Delete and Block

Don't crap on me

Don’t “should” all over yourself, when you must.

As much as your blogs, white papers, tips, etc. may be meant to help others you will eventually learn there are those in cyberspace who just don’t care to be a positive force for others, and will without hesitation use and hijack your social page, blog, post, etc. to advance their own self serving message or political agenda.

You own what you create, you also have a following for those who look forward to reading what you post from time to time. Once someone invades that space to ambush your readers for a self serving cause and worse yet to spill toxic waste all over your posts or comments its time to delete and block them.

Personally, I believe in freedom of speech although posts occurring on your own page have no such rights. We may be open to constructive criticism and feedback but not energy vampires, those who should be in anger management 11 step programs, or those who are just sociopaths.

You can tell when someone is just flaming or posting a one sided and unscientific or opinion based on no facts on you have shared. Often negative posts are done intentionally to get others to visit that commenter’s website and engage them. Logic tells you this is the wrong strategy, but in practice it really works! (Provided the manipulator knows what they are doing/writing.)

What do you do with those who exhibit this repeated harmful and abusive behavior?
Hit the eject button? Well easier — delete their post(s), block them, then delete them quickly and without comment. They don’t deserve the luxury of your time and energy, so don’t even go there.

When you engage someone who is poisoning you page or posts, they win. What I wouldn’t do for an app that sends a poison pill back to any harmful post (“harmful” — I mean malicious). Their reprehensible behavior also exists because they seek someone to debate so they can prove themselves right or claim justification for their existence by someone giving them the time of day to respond to something they posted. With these individuals you will ever win or even just come out not having wasted your time, and totally drained (I bet there are some people you’d like to introduce to these people). If you ignore them they will pick a fight with someone else. If you delete their post and block them they will never know because they lurk online doing this to as many people as they can slam themselves, or have a bot do it (as in Real Steel).

It amazes me how many guerilla spam messages this Word Press Blog receives as masked responses to my posts but are in fact links to their sites leveraged first by throwing up a big fat argumentative comment or rant to lure readers to check out the link for their side of the story .. which really is either a malware or trojan loaded site, or one that is trying to sell something and nothing to do with the topic at hand. I delete all such comments and report the poster to Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy, among app admins.

I know these comments and links are bad news because I’ve checked them out and even sent messages to the posters to find out who they were (they never respond as these are bot driven spam and links leading to malicious sites).

Act swiftly and don’t engage hostile posts that are way out in left field, unless the commenter seems legitimate and balanced. And even then don’t engage publicly.

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References

There can be a fire burning somewhere. Yet if there were two people watching it, they both may have different opinions of what they feel about it based on their references.

Take for example the 5.9 earthquake that shook the east coast at 2pm EST on August 23, 2011. It rattled houses and teeth from the Carolinas up through northern New England, and resulted in none to minimal damage, and no injuries reported.

The 911 centers, especially around VA which was the epi center were flooded with calls. The news played some of those calls.. how did they go? One had a lady calling in who was flustered, fearful, and speechless.. yet unharmed physically. The 911 operator had to ask her if there was any injuries, accident or risk to life and limb.. there was none. The caller was just emotionally upset and thought the world was coming to an end. As this persona had no reference what to do in an earthquake they didn’t know what to do nor knew if the end was near.

Shift now to the west coast, Japan, or South America where a level 6 is proverbially an every day occurrence. Unless buildings are collapsing, fires break out, water pipes bursting in red glare, or birds falling out of the sky 911 typically gets very few calls and those guys playing dominoes on their stoop keep playing. This is a funny yet important scene on common sense: in NYC people ran out of their buildings, which itself is a good idea during an earthquake, but then those same office workers on the east side, decided to congregate and wait UNDERNEATH the FDR highway, one of the city’s largest highways! Which in my opinion has some rusty seams and bolts.

Until people have experienced something already, an incident befalling them would be like a kid let loose in a candy store.. not knowing where to start. Their reference maybe that if something is going to fall then stand under something that can protect them without thinking what they are standing under can itself collapse without anything falling on it.

Here is an example of the law of contrast and it embedding into our references: people who complain about being broke, being forced to live in a small space or where the heat not being to their liking should check out how people in the rural areas of China, Mongolia, South America, or Africa live. It puts our own lives and expectations into perspective, yet when we come from a point in any one of these cultures or living conditions our references are built upon what we know about ourselves regardless of what is happening around us. What this means is references are often selfish and about “me”. Therefore it conforms to the ego more than the spiritual side.

When involved in the course of your business or personal finances do you see everything from a global perspective or local application? If you only think about the interests, needs and wants of your customer from a single point of view without treatise towards their references, culture, religion, socioeconomic tendencies, etc. you will fail in being as successful as you can be and remain being the neighborhood mom pop grocery store or hot dog stand on the corner.

Understand your own references and how it effects you and you will know how to command positive change in your life and business. Understand the references your customers have and you can take your relationship and communications with them to a whole new level. This is addressing and serving their ego and what it seeks to satisfy which may be any one or more human needs.

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Too Dumb to Fail

Have you ever experienced those dumb blonde jokes? You may find it surprising to learn those “blondes” someone may be referring to may not be so dumb after all :)

Sometimes to make things work the best path is not using force against force, or in martial arts what is referred to hard against hard. Butting heads just results in headaches. Strategically one of those tactics to succeed in your personal life and in business life is employing a soft on hard approach. Use your client’s or vendor’s negative, aggressive, didactic, or abrasive personality and energy to your advantage. This is an experiential strategy used in Kung Fu, Akido, and Jui Jitsu.

Understand at any moment in time there is one or more of six humans each of us are seeking to experience or satisfy. The need to be significant is one of those needs. Playing dumb defuses some of the ego pile driving while calming down an electric situation. This technique is useful in helping others feel better about themselves thereby building their confidence level — perhaps before a big game.

Ever ask for directions? It seems some people will leap tall buildings and bounds to help, or even walk you to where you are trying to go! How about when someone asks for advice? It seems all the experts come out at that point and the know it all’s come out of the woodwork.

People feel superior or more more knowledgeable if they do not feel threatened by the intelligence of the person they are interacting with. Its just a human weakness in some to not have high regard for oneself. When one’s guard is down that person is more receptive, and of clearer mind to communicate with.

When I use the term “play dumb”, it doesn’t mean be stupid or annoying, it means just be coy, innocent or are looking for someone with the answer other than yourself. Try it out next time you hit a brick wall in your sales interactions, marketing communication or working one on one.

If they think you don’t know they will offer their expertise and advise. You may not want to hear it although you will learn more than you ever imagined from just asking questions, listening, and absorbing.

Don’t go so far overboard where others think you’re simply a moron or dimwit.

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Do Others Drag You Into Their Fantasy Land?

How often do you change your mind about something? Do you change your mind as much as many change their cell phones or shoes?

Can you imagine dealing with customers or friends who tell you to order something for them or put it on hold where they don’t put down a deposit, or your friend makes plans with you to do something or go somewhere where you clear your calendar for them and then cancel the very next day? Nice buddies. I have a great job waiting for them in the army reserves.. next stop the Hurt Locker.

Is it possible there are more people who do this than those who don’t among those who initially respond with interest close to a close or sold out deadline? This happened to me — I should get sponsors to fund me being the test dummy. Over the course of just days I received not one, not two, but three separate instances where this happened. When you hear some of the reasons for the change of mind in less than 24 hours you mind will just numb. Who said “good things come in threes”? Are they selling the Brooklyn Bridge?

Case one.. after receiving the information the guest contacted me back “I’m in. How do I register?” .. info sent.. next day the email back read “.. Have to cancel, just found out my ex-wife is expecting..” What the heck?

Case two.. after speaking with the person on phone in the evening and telling them there were no other guests of same gender to share room, they asked to be put on wait list and for me to contact them back if someone else showed up. The very next day another interested party calls, I send them online payment while leaving message for guest from last night’s call. I get call back.. “..when I didn’t hear from you I made other plans and so not available to join the trip..” Double What the freakin’ heck!

Case three.. with one odd person now paid and waiting for one other person what will we do less than two weeks away from the trip date. Well another call comes in what happens? After over ten back and forth emails.. I was about to call. Yeah no kidding they must have been testing their email bandwidth capacity. They finally said in last email.. “its probably too late to register anyway, so they’ll see if they can join my next outing..” Helloooooo, anyone home?? Why would anyone sane person back and forth on emails responding to one question leading to more questions over ten emails if there was no space available? After informing them that there was a space available, they emailed back (am I living Ground Hog Day over again?) that they had not asked their boss, and it would be too late to ask. Now I know there are some dam great drugs going around out there! Okay they began these emails and questions one day with the last one the next day.. that is less than 24 hours of communications. Hmmm I was wondering if the existence of energy vampires in our midst was an urban legend, now I’m a believer!

It would be completely plausible and acceptable that someone may not be interested in something after reading through the details and seeing there isn’t a fit. Although when someone tells you they are interested and to hold a spot.. then to tell you no thanks after you jump through flaming hoops to make it happen for then the hoop may not be the only thing that will be burning.

These three scenarios really happened — you can’t make stories like this up! They all occurred within three weeks before a trip date and all within one week with a three day window of discussion but typically two.

Lessons from the field.. take a deposit or full payment the moment they ask you to hold a spot or put them on the wait list because in God we trust, all others pay cash. Unfortunately, the truth is money is the great equalizer in getting others to keep their commitments. How many people you know would change their minds in less than a day if they stood to lose their payment or deposit for changing their minds? I wasn’t referring to politicians.

The crop of magic mushrooms must be premium quality this year. And so this is how I turn lemons into lemonades.. why get angry when you laugh about it and share the tale with those who are entertained by these zany people in our whacky lives.

As there is nothing you can do nothing about these people you certainly can take care of your economy. Keep it protected, optimize it and keep it clear of distractions that derail you and your purpose.

Are you trustworthy, dependable, committed, focused, and clear? If not don’t fret, it looks like you are in good company :)

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Making Your Email a calling card and marketing tool

Your email calling card is invaluable in connecting those you are in email contact with how they can keep up to date on you and your business. It also can spell out other information you would like put in front of all your recipients without having to think about it.. it is a build once and auto load every time you send an email.

Make your statement, create a memorable experience and get it out there.

Here is information to consider adding into your email signature:

1. Your name and title
2. Company name
3. Company website
4. Phone number
5. Email for them to contact you
6. Facebook name
7. LinkedIn link
8. Blog link
9. Twitter feed
10. Projects or initiatives you are involved
11. Your QR tag
12. Your USP

Make your links clickable to make it as easy as possible for your email recipient to connect immediately and seamlessly. This is free marketing!

Done! You just automated providing your recipient useful information they can use. Plus, everyone they forward or copy your email to sees all your information now because in essence your business card is now being passed around without you having to even ask for it to be shared.

Your email signature is a great publicity and networking tool; and its completely free.

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S.T.O.P — This could save your business

In the world of experiential event marketing there are no second chances. Everything is live, it is immersive and the audience is hot wired into the mainframe of what you have going on.

Experience an Event formula that gets you through the most challenging times

Business experience can be a roller coaster ride

Like a roller coaster ascending its final climb you have plenty of time to think about what you are going to do on the way down — clutch the bars in front of you until your knuckles are white, grab hold of the person next to you until you cut off their circulation, or throw your hands up in the air and feel like you can fly like superman. Then comes the point of no return.. you very top, the summit, the precipice where there is no turning back.

Then you experience a sensation where you feel like your heart has stopped, your breath has stopped, and your world has come to a halt for a fleeting second as your coaster begins to move with an arching movement where the first cars begin to point vertically down towards Earth and disappear from sight.

Fortunately, all but the screaming, clawing and vise like grip are out of your control now and you just have to surrender to gravity and experience an adrenaline rush that sends your heart rate soaring and your fear factor in overdrive.

How do we take these lessons in planning live events? There are somethings you can control and cannot, there are those instances you can predict and those you cannot as well. When faced with difficult situations and worse yet caught in the midst of that downward run where everything seems like its out of control and is moving to fast for you to do anything about it, remember one important fact.. unlike a roller coaster screaming down the track that you cannot bring to a stop until it reaches a flat section or up, you can stop where you are at the moment and change your condition or perspective.

To accomplish this use the method of S.T.O.P. This allows you to reorganize your thoughts, consider logical alternatives while keeping your busy from suffering any more damage or harm, or mitigate any more fall out. What does S.T.O.P. mean?

S = Stop
T = Think
O = Observe
P = Proceed

Stop, whatever you are doing. As in Monopoly.. stop, do not proceed or continue any further until your next turn;

Think, take into account your situation, what are other current dangers or risks, what else can happen, what are your consequences, who can help, what is your alternative solutions, how are you going to accomplish what you set out to do, what absolutely needs to be accomplished despite any foregoing apocalyptic fallout or catastrophe;

Observe, seek your escape routes, alternatives, best practices. See what else will be affected by your actions, what is the root cause of the situation and how do you approach it safely to fix, does something need to be fixed or do you just move on past it, who else can help you, what tools are at hand for you to use;

Proceed, once you 80% comfortable everything is okay to proceed, you know you’ve done everything you can in the time allowed, and that you cannot wait any longer because of a safety or huge impact consequence then its time to make your move. You cannot be 100% sure you will be absolutely safe because that is you just being cautious.. sometimes too cautious which will leave you in worse shape.

Turning around and going back is also an option, but that cannot be done, you need to move forward, and you are at the peak of where you must make a decision think safety first, then business, and then proceed — at this point you need only need to be 80% certain if quick thinking and action are warranted. Self talk and irrational fears will consume more than 20% of your waking thoughts when your situation, event or project has been compromised or is going south in a hurry.

Use this when you feel helpless or in a live event or situation and it will help you get back in control and smooth the course for the balance of your project or event.

I have found the best approach to running a seamless event or business strategy before implementing is to rehearse it in your mind along with any number of what if scenarios. With this preparedness you will be ready to turn on a dime and come up with winning solutions in most cases instead of watching a bad situation get worse right before your eyes. Often smart business owners leave the planning and logistics to those who have been there and done it.

Carson Tang
www.carsonworldwide.com

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Web Conferencing Solutions

I stumbled upon these neat web conferencing apps. Although they don’t beat physical experiential events they nevertheless can create immersive experiences if done properly.

Here are a few you may want to check out:

1. Webex — for large audiences — paid subscription
2. GoToMeeting — for large audiences — paid subscription
3. DimDim — 20 or fewer guests, but also FREE!

Enjoy your success!
Carson

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Are You Being Judged? Know Your Customers’ Driving Forces

After watching a few emails hit my box with the same tone over the past few months had me itching to address an incredible issue still alive and thriving in this day and age. Today’s blog is about prejudging others.. this would include how others may view you, your business and what you do through myopic treatment.

There was a story you may have heard about a candidate having gone into a high level interview with the decision maker. After an hour and a half and a great second interview the interviewer concluded to say “I guess we have our new VP” to the candidate. Several weeks past and no call no contact nor returned calls from interviewer about the meeting. What happened? This was a story told by another employee who heard it from the Interviewer.

Ultimately, the candidate was passed up for another. Why do you think? This where the rule of 12’s can be seen being replayed not at the beginning of the meeting but at the end as well. You wonder what the rule of 12’s is?

It has to do with when you first meet someone:

Within 12′ feet you are judged;
Within 12″ inches you are labeled; and
Within 12 words you are written off.

The change of mind for the interviewer occurred after the candidate shook hands and was on the way out the door after shaking hands. Any guess as to what happened yet? Here it is — it was the back of the shoes they were wearing! For most they would be saying to themselves WTF? For some reason the interviewer felt the position required a degree of immaculate grooming and presence.

Accordingly, if the candidate was not able to make sure their shoes were not scuffed going into a meeting then that person did not live up to the interviewers self created standards. You may have heard similar stories, some true some spun from what most find impossible to believe.

Know that in this day and age, including here in America, prejudice and bias still exists. People still judge others on how they look, what they sound like, what they smell like, and all those don’t even speak to the point of what someone believes, thinks or even worships.

When you deal with customers, vendors, people and dates (in relationships) know that you are being judged. No matter how perfect you may think you are, you are not.. that is just the truth. And for those you seek business with or approval from know you may never live up to their standards. If you do that is great, you’ll get along.

For those who disapprove because they don’t agree with you, and worse still judge what you offer or you without even knowing you or ever even using your product or experiencing your service, know there is no way on this Earth they can comment about it with any credibility until they experience hands-on for themselves.

What is going on here? That individual has developed and anchored references in how they interpret and see “everything”. As they say the few bad apples make it bad for the rest of good guys. How does the letters “MLM” or multilevel marketing touch off something in you? Do you have negative references to this term? There are good and credible businesses build on a MLM or network marketing model those include Mary Kay Cosmetics, Agway, and others who have great products but because others use the same business model to swindle and dupe innocent bystanders lured into the net, the businesses using the same strategy in a legitimate way gets a bad rap.

Ever have someone tell you to stop spamming them or call an email you sent spam? Lets look at this in more detail.. people call any email spam if they don’t want it. That is not the definition of spam, often it is just unwanted email, even if they opted in to receive it. Here is what Spam is defined as: “The definition of spam when applied to e-mail is Unsolicited Bulk E-mail (UCE), e-mail that has been sent in bulk to recipients who have not given permission for the message to be sent to them. Spam is also known as junk e-mail.” Then under this definition is an email from a long lost relative or your utility company sending you and unwanted bill by internet considered spam? This has become whatever one wants to determine what spam is while remaining ignorant of what spam really is and begins tagging and calling all unwanted email spam.

What this means in the bigger picture is people are quick to judge and slow to understand. That goes for customers and vendors as well sometimes if you touch upon a raw nerve that associates with a reference they have formed in their mind.
The act of pre-judging is damaging, it is often hurtful, unproductive and could even result in lost opportunities, success, happiness, money, etc. In some respects pre-judging helps us stay safe from harm as we had our fingers burned once before in a given situation so why go through it again! Ever heard the term “past performance is not a guaranteed or indicator of future results”?

There are so many who have passed up on opportunities because they were turned off to something they had negative associations with way before the proverbial 12 words occur.

If you read the Celestine Prophecy and understand its import you will also know nothing happens without reason. Coincidence is not truly accurate. In the author’s observation what happens was meant to happen, as though everything has a process and purpose. When you look at your interactions with others in this respect, keep an open mind and not be pre-judgemental you will discover a happier more stress free lifestyle.

Call it compassion, patience or empathy. Whatever you call it remember there is nothing you can do in a million years to change the prejudice and bias of others, they can only change themselves. What you can change and within seconds is your attitude, outlook, how you interpret anything, and the way you approach any situation.

What a better world we would be living in if such toxic thoughts, irrational statements, or false claims were absent from our human capacity. Treat others as you would like to be treated and as you know what comes around goes around.

Success is a mindset, compassion is life line.

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Action and Traction Equal Results

Taking action for the results you want now
Have you been watching what has been going on in Wisconsin and Ohio? If you haven’t, as a business person you should. I am neither a democrat nor republican, nor do I disagree or agree with either side — at least you’ll never know, and this is not meant to be a political analysis or soap box rant about the ethical, morale or budget based nature of what is going on in those two states or any where else in America other than WI makes some mean Cheddar cheese and OH raises some pretty big corn fed men!

As a business owner we can’t always be right or at least guaranteed whatever we do or even say will be 100% correct because perfection doesn’t exist in nature nor technology.

With what has happened in WI and OH we see those who protest, complain, waive signs, plead their case, etc. and those who don’t make lots of noise but just do what they believe has to be done and do it — no matter what it takes. What is the reference here? Look at this closely, you have those who say allot (whether good or bad) and those who just oh well and just take action (whether good or bad, right or wrong — again this is not a discussion on morality nor the issue it is about results).

What you see is ‘results’ on one side, and ‘no results’ and disappointment on the other. Now in the future this may be another story if the inactive side takes action.. but for now the side that took action got the results.

As with anything in life taking action is the harbinger and a key to the secret to success. In the words of Stanley Kubrick, a legendary film maker, to his aspiring proteges “Get hold of a camera and some film and make a movie of any kind at all.” The important message he was conveying was just get started creating and most important lesson is the begin.

The reality is business, money, and results are not just going to fall in your lap and give you the lap dance of your life if you sit there and wish it. At the very least if you are even a couch potato you need to at least let one person know what you are looking for so you can manifest results.

If you are going to do it anyway, and you have exhausted your excuses.. then why wait for what you can do now? Let me say, its is less costly to do it now than if you procrastinate and try to do it later. Think of how much work is now needed in WI and OH to reverse what others have taken action to accomplish.

If there was someone who really really had a strategic mind and supported the Dems for the 2012 election (or perhaps the Democratic Party) hint hint — don’t you think now is a great time to set up a personal donation site on FB and/or MySpace and reach out to those who are really stirred up and agitated by the current situation and ask them to donate to a cause to support the candidates who will support their needs and right the wrongs they feel victims of? Well, we’ll see if someone takes action. If no one does, then perhaps one should ask who is to blame when the iron was still hot and no action was taken? Something to think about.

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